The No. 1 ‘Cheat Code’ Highly Successful People Use to Advance at Work, According to a Harvard Neuroscientist
Building meaningful relationships with your colleagues isn’t just a nice-to-have — it can be the key to advancing your career, reducing burnout, and improving your job satisfaction. Research has consistently shown that being liked at work can significantly influence career progression, from securing promotions to negotiating raises.
Juliette Han, a Harvard-trained neuroscientist and adjunct professor at Columbia Business School, argues that developing strong workplace relationships is a skill that anyone can master. It’s not reserved for just the high performers. According to Han, there’s one powerful “cheat code” highly successful people use to build connections and strengthen their careers: finding common ground with their colleagues.
Finding Common Ground: The Key to Building Relationships
Han isn’t suggesting that you fake interest in the same hobbies as your boss or colleagues. Instead, she emphasizes the importance of finding small, natural opportunities to align yourself with others in conversation. The goal is to show that you care about your colleagues and are invested in building rapport, which can have a profound impact on your career.
For example:
- If a colleague thanks you for your help, you might say: “No problem, I know you’d do the same for me.”
- When you’re working with your manager, asking them for advice can help strengthen your relationship: “You’ve handled similar situations so well, what kind of approach would you recommend here?”
These simple gestures show that you care about the person you’re interacting with and remind them that you see yourselves as a team. This approach not only builds stronger relationships but also makes your colleagues feel valued and more likely to support you in return.
Gaining Respect from Your Manager
Making a positive impression on your boss is crucial, and according to Han, showing genuine interest in their perspective can go a long way. Instead of simply completing tasks in isolation, consider engaging with your manager to better understand how your work contributes to the team’s goals. Han suggests two questions to foster a more collaborative relationship with your boss:
- “I want to better understand how this project fits into our team’s overarching goals, what’s your point of view on that?”
- “You’ve handled similar situations so well, what kind of approach would you recommend here?”
By asking these questions, you demonstrate that you value your boss’s expertise and are committed to making them look good. This not only strengthens your relationship but also helps you perform better by aligning your work with broader team objectives.
Additionally, if you’re assigned to a project with your manager, consider expressing enthusiasm and a willingness to collaborate: “I’m really excited to work on this together. How can I best support you on this?”
The Power of Compliments and Active Listening
One often-overlooked method for building rapport is offering sincere compliments. Recognizing a colleague’s skills, work ethic, or a well-executed presentation can go a long way. Han points out that offering praise not only builds goodwill but also encourages a culture of recognition and support within the workplace.
Example: Complimenting a coworker’s presentation or work ethic helps them feel appreciated and strengthens your connection with them.
But it’s not just about giving compliments; it’s also about showing that you listen and respect others’ preferences. Han explains that many high performers make the mistake of focusing solely on their individual tasks, assuming that hard work alone will be enough to propel their careers. However, true success often requires learning how to work well with others. Being a good team player, showing interest in others’ perspectives, and fostering open communication are essential to career advancement.
The Importance of Collaboration and Communication
Han stresses that one of the most common reasons high performers struggle to reach the top of their careers is their inability to collaborate effectively with others. While it’s important to be focused and dedicated to your work, it’s equally important to develop strong, positive relationships with the people you work with. Without these relationships, career growth can be significantly hindered.
Being a strong communicator and a team player is often the secret behind the success of highly successful people. They know how to leverage relationships, offer support to others, and build trust — all of which are essential for professional growth. By making a consistent effort to align yourself with others and show appreciation for their contributions, you’ll be well on your way to advancing in your career.
Conclusion: Build Connections for Career Success
In today’s fast-paced, competitive work environment, cultivating meaningful relationships with your colleagues is essential. Whether it’s showing appreciation, seeking advice, or aligning yourself with others through small gestures, these actions can make a big difference in your career progression. By focusing on collaboration and building rapport, you’ll not only feel more connected to your workplace but also set yourself up for greater success. Remember, it’s not just about what you do—it’s about how you work with others that makes all the difference.
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